I have a question for society. How do you show someone you care? What is appropriate? I look around and realize that people have a distorted sense of perception when it comes to this phenomena. To me, caring means treating someone kindly, with respect, and understanding, and or doing a great job at something.
Unfortunately, society, being as insane as it is has this concept that if someone isn’t flipping out, causing a ruckus, screaming, flailing about and obviously stressed out, they don’t care! Can you imagine? Knowing how stress directly effects the body and health, why would we willingly inflict that harm upon ourselves for the sake of others?
Has being stressed out EVER solved a problem, changed what already occurred to “make you stress”, and or make the whole situation go away? Why do we have to flip out for anyone to believe we care about them? That is the big question! It is a fact that when we put undo stress on ourselves, it impairs our ability to think clearly, it damages our cells, creates cancer and other health issues. DIS- Ease is titled disease for a REASON!
Wake up America. Being evolved, steady, calm and kind is a way to love yourselves and others. It is also the best way to come up with real workable solutions, and to allow your self to remain in health!
So people, stop accusing others of not caring because they aren’t out of control or exhibiting nutso behavior! It doesn’t mean they don’t care, it means they are watching out for their health. Stop demanding that others flip out to illustrate they care! It’s almost like you are saying, ENDANGER YOUR HEALTH and get a DIS EASE FOR ME to prove you care about me! Isn’t that INSANE to ask of anyone?!!
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The Myth of Stress Revealed
Where does stress really come from?
Published on April 22, 2010 by Andrew Bernstein in The Myth of Stress/Psychology Today
Where does stress come from? That’s easy. It comes from stressors like traffic jams, angry bosses, and screaming children.
But why? Why do stressors provoke stress in us? The answer, which is repeated in practically every article and book on stress (and which is disastrously wrong, as you’ll see in a moment) involves human evolution. Once upon a time (the story goes), our ancestors walked across the grassy plains, only to be confronted by… a saber-toothed tiger! These ancestors immediately experienced a hormonal surge, which you might remember from high school biology as the fight-or-flight response.
Those who had a strong fight-or-flight response were more likely to survive and produce offspring. Those who didn’t have a strong response, for obvious reasons, were not. And so, over the course of many generations, this response was strengthened, eventually becoming hardwired in us as a very useful adaptation. And then something unusual happened.
Life on Earth changed.
Civilizations formed. Villages, then towns, then cities appeared. And, in the space of a few thousand years—the mere blink of an eye from an evolutionary perspective—those grassy plains and saber-toothed tigers were replaced by super-highways and micromanaging bosses. And our fight-or-flight response, calibrated so well to respond to occasional threats, started going haywire.
And that, supposedly, is why we experience so much stress today. The number of stressors has multiplied exponentially: traffic, money, success, work/life balance, the economy, the environment, parenting, family conflict, relationships, disease. As the nature of human life has become far more complicated, our ancient stress response hasn’t been able to keep up. Our bodies react as if threats are everywhere, as if saber-toothed tigers have us surrounded. We have become victims of our own biology. And the best we can do (we are told) is breathe, relax, exercise, and try to cope.
As I explain in my book, The Myth of Stress, all of this is fundamentally wrong. It’s also incredibly costly. It costs you and your loved ones the emotional burden of living with stress everyday. It costs you the physical burden that necessarily follows. And, of course, it costs individuals, companies, and our government billions of dollars each year. Recovering these costs requires that we finally break through the myth of stress.
The truth is that stress doesn’t come from your boss, your kids, your spouse, traffic jams, health challenges, or other circumstances. It comes from your thoughts about these circumstances. More specifically, stress comes from a particular kind of thinking that humans happen to excel at. The more of this thinking you engage in, the more stress you experience.
